Just a few notes.
May. 11th, 2003 12:39 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
kyburgMom wants to celebrate Mother's Day next week when I can come out and retrieve my dog. That's love for you. I will do my best to get pictures of the Cairn Terror for you all - 11 years old and she can still leave destruction in her wake like no other.
Jim spent the entire visiting time at Sis' house yesterday playing Pokemon with my soon to be 7-year old niece. She was giving him pointers...nearly four hours worth of pointers. They traded Game Boys and played each other's games. Bonded. It's genetic, of course. I also maintain God allowed me revenge on my sister by giving her my children. Of course, it may backfire if He gives me hers....
It's almost two years now, isn't it![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
silverkun? It'll be five years this September. I still maintain Cliff isn't far - but I don't sense him as much as see where he's been. We may be within walking distance of Marukai in the new house...but we are also just as close to the Alpine Village and all the European/German goodies we can manage. It's freaky, and totally unplanned. evilshell is both in Switzerland and loves heavy metal - maybe, at last, I have found a home for Cliff's CD collection - minus the Dream Theater discs, of course. Found her on LJ when I really was wishing I could find another reason to go back to visit besides trying to reconcile with that part of the family. They haven't seen me in over ten years.
He's been very close this weekend, and I don't really know why. Maybe he misses me too. But then again, I always feel the same regret and resentment towards his illness and death as ever; had I the resources then that I do now, how much better his life could have been. But I have the resources I do now because he passed and I put the time in to prepare myself to live without him.
But the new house would have been so much easier for him to manage than the condo was. The weather would have been easier on him - we would have been so much closer to his doctors - the patio would have been wonderful to sit outside and sun in.
I swear, this anger will never leave me - it simply remains like hot ashes that will not cool, not even with time.
Make no mistake - he did not treat me honorably towards the end, and there was no physical way for him to stay any longer - but nobody deserves an end like his, and never so soon.
And if I began writing about him, I don't know where I would stop. There's nobody else to tell you about him but me anymore - and it's hard to justify leaving a single stroke out.
It's Mothers Day. I wonder who is taking his mother and grandmother out to lunch today. He had to drive out to Hesperia with his mother to take Mondi to the Apple Valley Inn - a truly bland, boring place on the par with a Harvest Buffet - but the only place in town suitable for such an event. We did it every year - until he got too ill to drive anymore. You wonder.
Happy Mother's Day to you all - however you choose to observe it.
Jim spent the entire visiting time at Sis' house yesterday playing Pokemon with my soon to be 7-year old niece. She was giving him pointers...nearly four hours worth of pointers. They traded Game Boys and played each other's games. Bonded. It's genetic, of course. I also maintain God allowed me revenge on my sister by giving her my children. Of course, it may backfire if He gives me hers....
It's almost two years now, isn't it
silverkun? It'll be five years this September. I still maintain Cliff isn't far - but I don't sense him as much as see where he's been. We may be within walking distance of Marukai in the new house...but we are also just as close to the Alpine Village and all the European/German goodies we can manage. It's freaky, and totally unplanned. evilshell is both in Switzerland and loves heavy metal - maybe, at last, I have found a home for Cliff's CD collection - minus the Dream Theater discs, of course. Found her on LJ when I really was wishing I could find another reason to go back to visit besides trying to reconcile with that part of the family. They haven't seen me in over ten years.He's been very close this weekend, and I don't really know why. Maybe he misses me too. But then again, I always feel the same regret and resentment towards his illness and death as ever; had I the resources then that I do now, how much better his life could have been. But I have the resources I do now because he passed and I put the time in to prepare myself to live without him.
But the new house would have been so much easier for him to manage than the condo was. The weather would have been easier on him - we would have been so much closer to his doctors - the patio would have been wonderful to sit outside and sun in.
I swear, this anger will never leave me - it simply remains like hot ashes that will not cool, not even with time.
Make no mistake - he did not treat me honorably towards the end, and there was no physical way for him to stay any longer - but nobody deserves an end like his, and never so soon.
And if I began writing about him, I don't know where I would stop. There's nobody else to tell you about him but me anymore - and it's hard to justify leaving a single stroke out.
It's Mothers Day. I wonder who is taking his mother and grandmother out to lunch today. He had to drive out to Hesperia with his mother to take Mondi to the Apple Valley Inn - a truly bland, boring place on the par with a Harvest Buffet - but the only place in town suitable for such an event. We did it every year - until he got too ill to drive anymore. You wonder.
Happy Mother's Day to you all - however you choose to observe it.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2003-05-11 02:47 pm (UTC)There's always a reason to visit Switzerland :) And I would love to meet you! If you do decide to come...please let me know!!!! (and hopefully by then we'll be in an apartment where we have enough space to offer you a place to sleep, too!)