kyburg | *slaps self*

We had another 911 call at work today - someone else upstairs in another department had to be taken to the hospital by ambulance. This really should be rarer than it is - we've had three calls in the last three months, and for a company where the median age is well below 30, it's troubling.

But not enough to bring one to tears, for heaven's sake.

Really, Self. Unsinkable is what everyone wants right now, not the Quivering Mass of Female Hysteria.

Honest - they're asking me if I really want to take anything else on right now...and that maybe "this is not a good time." Fuck.

There is no more time to wait for things to get better.

This is a good as it gets. This is the best it's ever been.

But I keep looking at the callendar and wondering if this is the last week I'll have my mother.

And I can't even talk to her about it. Just wouldn't be right, not at all.

I guess I've had the rug dragged out from under one too many times.

And I am so sick of my finances I could scream.