Mission Accomplished

[kyburg]

My knees are dirty. They were muddy, but that was a couple of hours ago.

It took me three hours to do the deed - go to the nursery, buy tools and supplies (and having a florist shop attached doesn't hurt - bought a spray of the nicest yellow with red edges roses to go with) and head for Pasadena.

A favor to do him, I say.

I swear to you all now - by this time next year, I won't be driving that truck. FEH. Yucky-poo. Ick. I worked those pedals like a stairmaster - and that beast just won't go over 60 anymore.

They've converted the old school ground at Anokia into "Estate Homes." Think Hogwarts-size boarding school grounds. Think disgustingly huge houses right next to each other - no yards. Welcome to Southern California - pay the man. Bah.

I was thinking about driving up the hill to see the old house, but got sidetracked. Just as well - the family sold it almost ten years ago and if I didn't like what I saw, I'd be the only one who cared. Best leave my memory alone.

I came armed this year with pruning shears, and used them. The neighbor's succulent ground cover had covered a lot of ground this past year. Well, you can see Cliff's stone now, by gum. However, it's nearly bare of grass as well.

I planted three lily-of-the-valley and ten freesia bulbs. Watered thoroughly. Drank some straight out of the hose. Yanked much crabgrass. I must have been Asian in my past life to keep doing this tending of the grave every year. But damn, if it didn't look so much better when I was done -

And I left a stone and the five roses. Next year, I'll leave a register like they do at the top of the mountains.

The cemetery itself looked fine and lovely - which it always does, strangely enough. I felt as if someone was watching me work, wondering what I was so hyped up about - but not complaining. I remember thinking "Cliff, where are you?" - and much as in past years, I don't hear as much as feel it - but "You know where I am."

Whatever he's doing, he's doing contentedly - no complaints.

On the way back, I stopped in at the used book place where I'd had an Ebay order waiting for me since July - more about that later.

I don't think anyone has been to see him all year. It's sad, but I always told Cliff he was kidding when he told me how much his family got tired of him. I guess he was right - and I was wrong.

Even if it's only once a year. I won't forget. It was only three hours, after all.

Comments

[riverheart.livejournal.com]

*hugs*

Bob has no grave. Didn't want one. I knew he wanted to be cremated, and preferably to have his ashes sent into space; failing that, he wanted them scattered over the mountains. They're scattered over a high ridge in the Cascades, a ridge covered with the tall old-growth firs he loved, and one which is impossible to log. His ashes help to fertilize the soil and add back to the nutrient balance of the forest. It's fitting, for his ashes to rest among the trees; he was such a lover of trees.

I can place no stone there. I can place no flowers there. It's viewable only from the air, and not reachable on foot at all (not even a copter could land on that ridge).

I think maybe some sort of memorial installation would be fitting, but I'm not sure what - or where.

He did leave a rather good memorial of his own, though - the stage at Paradux Hill. He built that, almost entirely by himself; Chris, Sue, and Allyn helped with installing the support posts and framing, but Bob cut and installed every single one of the deck boards. In three years, it hasn't moved at all, despite the fact that it's right next to a pond on sloped ground. That man could build.

His login at the WELL was retired. That speaks volumes, too, if you know the WELL.

I still miss him so...

He would have been 45 yesterday.

[reannon.livejournal.com]

I am without words. Anything I could say would be insufficient to the way this touched me.

[kyburg.livejournal.com]

The fact that a sysadmin is aware enough to "retire" an account name is admirable enough, even if I didn't know the WELL (mostly by association).

A good memorial would be one that "lives," like a computer lab or a scholarship fund, methinks.

[kyburg.livejournal.com]

Coming from you, that's high praise. Thanks.

[snickerpuss.livejournal.com]

Thanks for sharing this with us... it was very touching.