Gotta sleep sometime....
Jan. 20th, 2004 10:23 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
kyburgI wish I had another six hours.
Today was the day of "where the fuck did that come from?"
As in, the dads in our department were back in after being out yesterday with their kids. Because it was a school holiday. Yanno. No big deal.
And all I could think of was how I had to leave Cliff home alone with only Meals on Wheels and a phone call at 2:30 to keep him alive until I got home at seven. At least four times, when he didn't answer the phone at 2:30, I'd have called the police to go over and check on him for me - and they'd found him in a coma and transported him.
Why wasn't I home to look after him myself? I had to work - I was hourly, I was deathly afraid of losing my job and every time I mentioned him to my boss, the response was "this is not a good time for him to be sick right now." No shit. I got mine back - when I got the call telling me he'd passed at 1:30 AM, I called the bastid at 2:00 AM to tell him I wouldn't be in and why. I went in that day anyway - and the day after. I didn't miss one single day of work, even when my husband died.
But now - the dads just tell the boss they have to go home and look after the kids because school's out - and it's fine. It's a different company, a different man in charge -
I've tried to explain what happened - and their attitude is not overt, but surely I could have done something about it and was too stupid not to.. Just didn't have the Right Stuff - just a garden variety pudnocker. LOOOOSER.
I'd love to have the two perfect kids, too - ya jerk. I'd have loved to have spent the last ten years working here, too. I've been more things to more companies for more reasons that you'd ever like to think of - but because I'm not -whatever it is today- it doesn't have any value.
It would be nice if they would simply attribute some of it to just plain fortune.
I have to remember. This reaction is denial of the reality of it - it didn't happen to them because THEY were smart, THEY were cool, THEY did all the right things. Instead of because it just didn't happen to them, period. But it could - oh yes, it could. But until something like it does, it's all them. It's a common reaction, and I can understand it.
But dammit, today - I resent it to holy hell.
Shake it off, bitch. It'll make you a bitter old woman, for sure.
Today was the day of "where the fuck did that come from?"
As in, the dads in our department were back in after being out yesterday with their kids. Because it was a school holiday. Yanno. No big deal.
And all I could think of was how I had to leave Cliff home alone with only Meals on Wheels and a phone call at 2:30 to keep him alive until I got home at seven. At least four times, when he didn't answer the phone at 2:30, I'd have called the police to go over and check on him for me - and they'd found him in a coma and transported him.
Why wasn't I home to look after him myself? I had to work - I was hourly, I was deathly afraid of losing my job and every time I mentioned him to my boss, the response was "this is not a good time for him to be sick right now." No shit. I got mine back - when I got the call telling me he'd passed at 1:30 AM, I called the bastid at 2:00 AM to tell him I wouldn't be in and why. I went in that day anyway - and the day after. I didn't miss one single day of work, even when my husband died.
But now - the dads just tell the boss they have to go home and look after the kids because school's out - and it's fine. It's a different company, a different man in charge -
I've tried to explain what happened - and their attitude is not overt, but surely I could have done something about it and was too stupid not to.. Just didn't have the Right Stuff - just a garden variety pudnocker. LOOOOSER.
I'd love to have the two perfect kids, too - ya jerk. I'd have loved to have spent the last ten years working here, too. I've been more things to more companies for more reasons that you'd ever like to think of - but because I'm not -whatever it is today- it doesn't have any value.
It would be nice if they would simply attribute some of it to just plain fortune.
I have to remember. This reaction is denial of the reality of it - it didn't happen to them because THEY were smart, THEY were cool, THEY did all the right things. Instead of because it just didn't happen to them, period. But it could - oh yes, it could. But until something like it does, it's all them. It's a common reaction, and I can understand it.
But dammit, today - I resent it to holy hell.
Shake it off, bitch. It'll make you a bitter old woman, for sure.
