*sigh*

[kyburg]

This reminds me of my first exposure to homosexuality at the age of 11. Sitting at the breakfast table when Mom came home from work late one morning...after helping one man find a funeral home to bury his partner of over 30 years.

Because nobody in town would help a gay man bury his partner, and there was no family to call to help him. Mom was both very sad...and pissed. "Neither of them had so much as a traffic ticket, and they get treated like this!" I'll never forget it.

One guy 64 years old, the deceased 69. Nothing that people do behind closed doors that harms no one - shoot, they never even knew about them until one of them croaked in the ER - is worth hating about.

firez, chefbigdaddy, I'm looking right at you. Better take some steps, or this will happen to you.

But please. Don't ask me to be surprised.

Comments

[blukat.livejournal.com]

I can't believe they are sueing the man for back rent????
Why does the cruelty level in this country seem to be rising? I have my thoughts on that, but won't get into a political/media rant here.

I wonder if they had done a living trust it might have kept this from happening?

And it's not the first time a family had gone after each other when someone dies, I've seen it happen so often. Greed over-rules everything. Sad.

[tibicina.livejournal.com]

*nods* As you and others have said... the fighting of the will and the decision about it are sad and I dislike them. But suing the man for backrent... that's just... /evil/. I can't find a less harsh word that covers it.

[blukat.livejournal.com]

I hope that the judge finds that since there is no rental agreement between him and the cousins (or his lover), that the cousins are screwed. There are other non-legal reasons I can think of that these cousins do not deserve one penny, but in a court of law, contracts are what will make or break a case.

Man

[turandot.livejournal.com]

Those cousins are jerks. I can understand going after the will on a technicality, because frankly, many would be heirs would be tempted by such a possibility. But suing for back rent? That's just adding insult to injury.

[phoenix--rising.livejournal.com]

The last part made me cry...

He said he was continuing to fight the cousins, who are suing for back rent for the years he lived on the ranch.

[luscious-purple.livejournal.com]

Ugh, that's a sad story. Your mom was right.

Sometimes I wonder whether these anti-gay-couple laws are also going to be applied to unmarried heterosexual couples (just because, in the eyes of the religious right, that's sinful too). So, single folks, don't think you're "off the hook" just because you're not GLBT.

[bigbigtruck.livejournal.com]

Marriage and sex are solely for procreation, so they'd have to come after us childless/free couples too!

[terredancer.livejournal.com]

I can't believe this is still happening.

I've heard similar stories time and time and time again and it never stops making me mad and sad all mixed up together.

How can people be so...

*grinds teeth*

I guess it could be said I'm at a loss for words :p

[vampireanneke.livejournal.com]

I know of a straight couple who had something similuar happen. The relatives took everything when the husband died, and the wife had nothing. They never got married because they didn't believe in it. They had been together 30+ years. Luckily one of the man's relatives was a friend of mine and a good guy at the time. He walked into the house and picked up a stack of items his spouse really wanted and walked right out with them. No one dared stop him. (Then he's a big guy). He was just as disgusted by his family's actions.

[(Anonymous)]

Back rent? I though my mom refusing to admit my (now deseased) great uncle's companion of 50 years was more than a roommate was insane. When our uncle died, his companion flew halfway across the country to bring us things he thought we should have had. When my bro later announced that the boyfriend had been pretty cool, the temps dropped and mom frostily announced he was a ROOMMATE. Because everyone has the same roommate for 50 years. I'm glad they were poor. Nobody could do anything. A ROOMMATE would mail your relatives your mementos. A SO would fly up to bring them.

Be prepared...

[n6vfp.livejournal.com]

Similar...I was sharing with a roomie who was a heavy drinker. When he died of liver damage his ex-wife got everything and his relatives got nothing because he never made a new will and his ex-wife was able to produce a properly witnessed will. His Dad even lost all the family mementos that he had given his son. No matter what your status or sexual orientation, get your documents in order.

[bigbigtruck.livejournal.com]

MOTHERFUCKING BACK RENT AS,JSDFHAJKDFHDSKFJAHSLDJKWGHS

Talk about adding insult to injury.

[bigbigtruck.livejournal.com]

edit: fuck, beaten by turandot

[sakuya-masaki.livejournal.com]

That is just so sad and wrong. Stories like this make me ashamed to be an American. T.T

[lysana.livejournal.com]

They make me realize I'm more of a American than those assholes ever will be.

[nagasvoice.livejournal.com]

As the story points out, you have to get the paperwork done right, dotted is and crossed t's and all. Competent legal help, no excuses, no shortcuts.
In hostile courts there's a tendency to *look* for teeny errors and hang it on that.
Those partners clearly had what amounted to a holographic will, the testator's intent was clear, and in many states that would have been more than enough.
Maybe not in that state--or maybe just not in that court. It's not just the one judge, because their cases get reviewed, and something like that can be appealed.
Maybe the homophobic new law really did tie the court's hands on it.

Interesting how the partners got no help from the cousins to care for the sick man, but they're all over the place the instant he's died.
That seems to be another common trait of the funerary vultures in such families. They do not respond to the gentle reasoning of fellow family members trying to persuade them to be kind, from the stories I've heard.

[dudemungus.livejournal.com]

Exactly--especially if you are gay, lesbian or common law. Even if you just have a nephew you think would like all your old toys, make it legal, and make it known to your family. It sounds like the family is pretty despicable, and it does sound like a pretty homophobic attack. I am glad that here in the frozen north, steps are being taken in the direction of recognising couples of different orientations.

And on the bright side, the first summer they legalized gay marriage here, there was a cruise to Halifax with like, a shipload of gay and lesbian couples coming up to either get hitched or support friends getting hitched. It's slow, but it's coming. Just watch how you vote, and we'll all be fine.

[poetpaladin.livejournal.com]

It's sick how the cousins are trying to sue for back rent.

[poetpaladin.livejournal.com]

Not to mention the whole "taking away" thing.

This should be NATIONAL news.

[dudemungus.livejournal.com]

Unfortunately, we live in a time where the media tends to be of one message, and currently, it is not newsworthy to crush a defenseless minority

[djdig.livejournal.com]

That is the sadest thing I've read!

[figmo.livejournal.com]

This kind of sick behavior goes on with straight couples and obvious inheritances.

My maternal grandmother was in charge of my great uncle's estate (her only sibling left). Uncle Pete was a bachelor. While his estate was in probate, Grandmom died, and my mother, an only child, was left in charge of probating both estates.

One branch of the family got together and demanded extra money out of the estate because "your mother didn't like our mother (Grandmom and Uncle Pete's younger sister) very much." This was bullsh*t. These cousins were jealous of my mother because a) she'd married a guy who became a dentist and b) their father was sexually abusive and Mom's wasn't. This infuriated Mom and me because the branch of the family that could have used it the most was the other branch, our cousins who were totally orphaned when she was 19 and he was 21 and had been physically abused by their late father and had to support their ailing mother when they were only in high school.