How many times have you heard this one?

[kyburg]

"Malicious talk, therefore, is a serious and troublesome matter, for it is the sustenance and recreation of some people. You should not, however, accept empty hearsay, lest you become a receptacle for other people’s evils. Keep your own soul unlettered. For, by accepting the foul-smelling garbage of words, you will introduce stains to your prayer through your thoughts, and without cause you will hate your associates.
- Life of Syncletica
Quoted in Essential Monastic Wisdom: Writings on the Contemplative Life by Hugh Feiss.

Syncletica was born somewhere around 350 -it's unclear exactly when. I'd have to say she predates the internet, neh?

Other people's stuff is other's people's stuff. You aren't obligated to let other people track their dirty feet through your head. Matter of fact, it's not good for your perspective either.

Comments

[caitlin.livejournal.com]

Oh! You mean like the sturm und drang that seems to swirl around my ex-boything...

Yeah...

I try not to spread rumour and innuendo. I get into enough trouble without all of that nonsense.

C.

[kyburg.livejournal.com]

It's the ability to scrape 'em off and then be able to justify doing so. It's their stuff. Let them have their stuff.

This ain't a stuff account bank that garners interest on other people's stuff, after all. ^^

Also, this was true thousands of years ago. The internet certainly didn't develop the concept - which I find highly amusing.

John Gabriel's Greater Internet Fuckwad Theory

[dracowayfarer.livejournal.com]

It's true, though, I think. Negative thoughts and emotions only spawn more of the same.

Re: John Gabriel's Greater Internet Fuckwad Theory

[kyburg.livejournal.com]

Don't provide an audience, I always say. You want to be a jackass? Sure. Do it here and it'll be removed quietly and without fanfare of any kind, and a second opportunity won't be provided. And then I'll completely forget all about it.

Some people collect this stuff - I can see it from a legal standpoint, if you have issues that direction - but have it around, like last year's pr0n, just for the entertainment value? Dude. Some people need a hobby and this ain't it.

[the-resa.livejournal.com]

This is why when people ask me if I can "keep a secret?" I always say "no."

You'd be surprised what verbal contortions such folk go through to convince themselves that it is still okay to tell you. I even told one determined individual that I did not like secrets and left then left the building ... only to have them follow me out, still trying to convince me to listen.

I learned a long time ago that the first person to throw the stone is the one to be wary of.

[kyburg.livejournal.com]

I find it's important to be able to take things in - and not retain them. Keeping the stuff separate in your head - along with any personal responsibility I might feel towards it - has been one of the most important things in keeping my sanity in life.

Listen, always. But also set boundaries, and make sure that's conveyed.

When someone *has* to tell me something or bust - sure. Go ahead. Now that you've told me? Now what are you going to do?

Oh, I'm not always nice. I aim to be kind. But I'm not going to be nice to you if it's not good for you, either.

[froghugger.livejournal.com]

How pertinent this post is to a conversation I was a part of last night. The boy I'm dating was starting to speak really ill about his parents and while he is certainly entitled to his feelings, I asked that he stop sharing them because otherwise even if his parents have good points I'd neglect to see them through all the crappy things he was saying about them. I told him I'd hate to dislike his folks before I even had the chance to meet them. He didn't realize what he was doing until I pointed it out.

[kyburg.livejournal.com]

"I only know what you've told me."

*sigh*