w00t w00t booyah

It finally came to me on the morning drive.

I really don't get the whole 'zombie' thing. I mean, sure - from a certain point of view, I suppose the whole thing could be entertaining, if that sort of thing works for you. But for me, the whole 'unkillable, eats your brains and then you become One of Them' just didn't ring very true. I mean, if that's your destiny - best to just get it over with, right? Very short story with a less-than successful ending, neh? The whole scream, flail and run just didn't make any sense. You die - they don't. I've played enough video games to know what happens when I find the hack to make my player unkillable - it really makes winning fast and efficient. *shrug* I'll start looking at my watch, if you ask me to watch a zombie movie. I mean...we know how this ends, right?

I can understand people using 'zombie' to describe a stuck process as well. And well, you 'kill' zombie processes, and they go away. Until something else flips a bit and gets stuck muttering to itself, taking up resources and generally accomplishing nothing.

Accomplishing nothing but creating more of the same...and none of it very pleasant. Rather stinky and evil, come to think of it.

Then it hit me. I have a number of relationships with real people I can easily call 'zombies.' Not the people, mind - the actual status of the relationship I might have had with them once. I have never experienced the 'break-up' - but this is the closest thing to it I can think of.

Remember, this is what I consider most important in life:

Always do your best.
If you make a mess, clean it up.
And remember your impact on others.

If I can't be excellent to you, I'll be nothing to you. Generally speaking, I have a sharp enough tongue that this takes care of itself.

But it has happened when I have very firmly taken three steps back and said 'this is going to end badly if I stick around' - and well, what's left?

Zombie relationship. It's still there, but it's pretty clear if I touch it again, something really bad is guaranteed to happen. Mind you, it's rare - but this is me we're talking about. I'm pretty much an expert on me. If I say something bad is going to happen if you put me in proximity to X factor, this is the smartest person in the world on that subject and you might just want to listen to her.

My memory is good. Good enough for me to remember what put the relationship into zombie status every time I think I might want to do something about changing things about it.

Some people are proud of their tempers. I know just how dangerous mine is - you get a peek once in a while, but it's been trained to a faretheewell.

So I don't chance it. I don't know anyone who really deserves that. And I don't wanna.

It's that whole 'I don't do this very well' - like shooting pool and arranging flowers. This is something I know I don't do well, so I don't volunteer for it. (Seriously. You want to kick my ass, play pool with me. I suck. We had the pool table in the garage for decades growing up. I never got any better. Trust me, there was plenty of opportuntiy for improvement. Take me bowling, and I'll kick your ass. Just saying.)

I don't do zombies.

And if you should find yourself facing such a place with me, you might ask yourself which one of us the zombie really is before taking offense about it.

It finally came to me on the morning drive.

I really don't get the whole 'zombie' thing. I mean, sure - from a certain point of view, I suppose the whole thing could be entertaining, if that sort of thing works for you. But for me, the whole 'unkillable, eats your brains and then you become One of Them' just didn't ring very true. I mean, if that's your destiny - best to just get it over with, right? Very short story with a less-than successful ending, neh? The whole scream, flail and run just didn't make any sense. You die - they don't. I've played enough video games to know what happens when I find the hack to make my player unkillable - it really makes winning fast and efficient. *shrug* I'll start looking at my watch, if you ask me to watch a zombie movie. I mean...we know how this ends, right?

I can understand people using 'zombie' to describe a stuck process as well. And well, you 'kill' zombie processes, and they go away. Until something else flips a bit and gets stuck muttering to itself, taking up resources and generally accomplishing nothing.

Accomplishing nothing but creating more of the same...and none of it very pleasant. Rather stinky and evil, come to think of it.

Then it hit me. I have a number of relationships with real people I can easily call 'zombies.' Not the people, mind - the actual status of the relationship I might have had with them once. I have never experienced the 'break-up' - but this is the closest thing to it I can think of.

Remember, this is what I consider most important in life:

Always do your best.
If you make a mess, clean it up.
And remember your impact on others.

If I can't be excellent to you, I'll be nothing to you. Generally speaking, I have a sharp enough tongue that this takes care of itself.

But it has happened when I have very firmly taken three steps back and said 'this is going to end badly if I stick around' - and well, what's left?

Zombie relationship. It's still there, but it's pretty clear if I touch it again, something really bad is guaranteed to happen. Mind you, it's rare - but this is me we're talking about. I'm pretty much an expert on me. If I say something bad is going to happen if you put me in proximity to X factor, this is the smartest person in the world on that subject and you might just want to listen to her.

My memory is good. Good enough for me to remember what put the relationship into zombie status every time I think I might want to do something about changing things about it.

Some people are proud of their tempers. I know just how dangerous mine is - you get a peek once in a while, but it's been trained to a faretheewell.

So I don't chance it. I don't know anyone who really deserves that. And I don't wanna.

It's that whole 'I don't do this very well' - like shooting pool and arranging flowers. This is something I know I don't do well, so I don't volunteer for it. (Seriously. You want to kick my ass, play pool with me. I suck. We had the pool table in the garage for decades growing up. I never got any better. Trust me, there was plenty of opportuntiy for improvement. Take me bowling, and I'll kick your ass. Just saying.)

I don't do zombies.

And if you should find yourself facing such a place with me, you might ask yourself which one of us the zombie really is before taking offense about it.

I'm not poly - and this bugs the CRAP out of me:

And even if you never so much as touch him, this emotional attachment has just as much potential as a sexual fling to damage your marriage. "We only have so much emotional energy; the more of it we spend outside of our marriage, the less we have inside our marriage," says Neuman. "And after a while, we simply do not have enough emotions and love and caring and time for both."

I'll admit it - I know I can't maintain the same level of intense with more than one partner at a time.

But to just simply la-de-da into something? And then make the base assumption this is true ALWAYS?

Wow. Fall in love, don't have friends. Matter of fact, you have kids? By this token...okay. COME ON.

Of course, you read on - and HAY. You always start lying about stuff like this, and it ends up in bed and....

Discuss amongst yourselves. I've got things to do.

EDIT: OH FUCK IT'S ONLY WOMEN WHO DO THIS. *shreds*

I can be very direct when I'm trying to make a point.

I wish I had that much courage when I'm trying to be good to someone...I'm just not that nimble at it.

I can do really neat things, yes - I try hard.

But when I really want to be helpful, that's when I become all thumbs and start clucking.

CHEEEEE-KOON.

BTW, I said behave folks. It's only the 8th. Judas Priest on stick.

I can be very direct when I'm trying to make a point.

I wish I had that much courage when I'm trying to be good to someone...I'm just not that nimble at it.

I can do really neat things, yes - I try hard.

But when I really want to be helpful, that's when I become all thumbs and start clucking.

CHEEEEE-KOON.

BTW, I said behave folks. It's only the 8th. Judas Priest on stick.

And catsonmars shall soon be here - and life will be thus Good.

I, uh, get to make some noise and racket with him for his birthday all day today. Wish me luck. I'm going for quiet and you've NEVARH done this. Again, wish me.

However, another topic for posting keeps tapping me on the shoulder (this one, and the Tit Envy post I've been working enough courage up for over years. *meeps*)

No, this one smacks of really Dangerous. It's the one about dealing with one member of a mated pair. In good times, in bad times and how to keep one in one piece while doing it.

Because, in my experience? There's only one state dealing with mated pairs is in.

Good - which is, good with both of them. Or disasterous, which is good with one, awful with the other - and the awful quickly jumps to the other one and the whole thing crashes and burns ala Hindenburg.

And I run screaming for cover, kicking myself for not seeing it coming Yet Again.

I'll get to it soon. Yes, this is in good times and bad, and breakups and weddings and all that.

But now, I have stuff to do away from this computer. *bows*

Some people have a weird-ass sense of what's funny at times.

For the record, the short statement is simple: abuse is never okay.

And if it's visible, and between two people who say they're in love? Dude. I'm going to say something.

Because...no, shit - there I was.

For fifteen years.

(And again, for the record? Yeah, I think he loved me. Sometimes. That's the hard part.)

Some people have a weird-ass sense of what's funny at times.

For the record, the short statement is simple: abuse is never okay.

And if it's visible, and between two people who say they're in love? Dude. I'm going to say something.

Because...no, shit - there I was.

For fifteen years.

(And again, for the record? Yeah, I think he loved me. Sometimes. That's the hard part.)

LJ'er theferrett makes it all easy for you. Go take a look.